Sept5 23:34

How lovely to see

Nature’s great seasonal giants

Sucking in a feed of rain before falls stripping subsequent to summers scorching

Cloud cover comforter

Soon leaves fall like tears mourning past and fearing future

Comfort in color of flame

Late August light draws in/near

Light lanterns

Apple bells in gypsy tambourine wreaths tumbling from stalks of trees

Fat ,chubby Rosie rose hips in colonies, a spray, coupled , lone bob and sway in August cool breeze, like a Bruegel painting of social groupings

Super excited about Aberystwyth

Am doing maps of meaning by j Peterson.

Just did introduction to lacan .

Thinks of PhD question ..

Aug23 18:59 Wednesday

My favourite smell is wet tarmac/gravel after it’s rained

The sociopsycology of addiction obsession

Aug 24 19:58 Friday

Another day hoovering carpets.

Somebody heard my name mentioned on the radio.

Thinks of a show..

Called Lenny

(I wrote it a while ago but I cannot trust W press)

Ha ha got you ..

Shit town

Ester parel

Aug 28 18:21 Tuesday

On dog walk with Oscar.

Trees with George tomorrow.

6 hours hoovering today.

Working on Pats piece over weekend

Listening to maps of meaning by j Peterson

Aug30 07:17 Thursday

Hav put in enquiries about a campervan on eBay let’s just plan next years fun!

No word from Aberystwyth

Oscar met daisy in the car park

Thinks of moon painting for H

Exercises by the river

Lower back pain

Mist over river looks like steam

The sun rises warm fast

Low atmospheric blur filter. Morning haze, soft light

Opposite, the moon a few zen brushstrokes on a powder blue sky , it’s bottom right disappearing into textured shadow and imagined space

More trees today

Oscars shadow gently bouncing behind mind on the car park tarmac

Light flickers through church yard yews, magic lanterns

Dereks plaice. The only stall on the market.

Aug 31 08:08 Fried egg

Thinks about painting in gloss. The shiny reflective surface brings in external images . Wow!

More bang for your buck as it were

Does it work for dark object next to white gloss surface as well as

Sun rises due east sets due west

The moon and the sun are both out

Cut, paste, post

Print

Sept5 2:15 wed

OMG! A mad day trying to buy a camper off eBay. It’s been going on for at least 48 hours. My seller is bonkers enthusiastic or in some way a grifter.. it was been my dream to be camper , but the red tape?

Also watching the meg trailers again and again . What is it about jaws and then super jaws?

No word from Aberystwyth

Must post tonight as blurb gets lost otherwise. Many a special turn of phrase has been lost due to connectivity failure

20 aug 8:55 Monday

@ workshop before work

Did a good bit of writing over we but lost it when batts died. Shame

Working on Pats piece over we fitting together right side . Trying to hone down the crazy quilt

Walked up Linley tree with O . He enjoyed the windy bits I liked the view. That poor old tree is really dead. It won welsh tree of the year 2014 then was struck by lightning

Thinking about Mimi’s painting. Is it sunset or sunrise? Not sure yet

16th July 15:32 Monday

The book club Hoxton..

Waiting to meet a man about selling some Art..

Sadness due to memories of living here, dying here, leaving here..

Once I was in wales this place became a distant worn out page of a torn up book..when I return it all comes flooding back

Thursday 12th July 8:06am

Greggs Pride hill watching the homeless . 1hour early for dentist appointment .

Last night went well. PC and no booze. Say there sewing and letting others drink. The smell of wine was enough..

Increasingly enjoying the peace that I can create around me. I don’t have to react to everything. Turning thoughts in my mind like shining pennies

Aberystwyth

Tuesday evening 23:25

Started making an entry the other day but it deleted itself..grrrr

Aberystwyth today in my pink jeep with mum . A visit to the Art school open day at the University.

They were so welcoming and it was as if it were meant to be..

It was so thrilling , sitting in the lecture theatre listening to a lecture, going round the print room , talking to the postgrad students.. the sea view, the black and white tiled floors . A skeleton in the closet.

It was too perfect.

Mum was impressed too

We had chips on the seafront

It’s a beautiful place

Then a drive home and the anticlimax.

A sudden low in spirit. Even a run could not stave it off.. it just made the step down easier.

The decision to complete my education popped into my head with such a relief . (PHD), but the decision cuts and kills all other possibilities. Relationship, family, alcoholism. Scared stuff

By the way the holiday in Spain was great! I drove on the other side, but firstly to be amongst friends was awesome ..

Max died whilst I was away. Oscar has been affected, mum cry’s and still I have not had it affect me..